God wounded me

I rode my first motorcycle when I was about 12 years old. Thousand upon thousands of miles on mini-bikes and motorcycles.

I don't do a lot of things for myself, ie, golf, hunt, fish, bowl, etc. But I did ride motorcycles. I could breathe on my bike. It was a great place to be.

God allowed an accident in November of 2007 and I have not ridden since. OUCH. That hurt. Though my injuries were minor, the bike was totaled.

I trust God for the every day details of my life. I did not begin this walk of God to have Him be a part of my life, but rather for HIM to be my life, my love and my reason for living. Our walk together is intimate, powerful and ever growing. And YOU allowed me to be thrown off my bike and it totaled. YOU are sovereign. YOU are God and there is no other. OUCH. That hurt.

I realize now that YOU did not hurt my heart but rather my soul. My mind, my emotions, my will. Perhaps my soul treasured my riding too much. I know that is the place where IDOLS are created from IDEALS. I still trust YOU. YOU are still my life, live and reason for living. I trust YOU completely.

The thought of the pain of my family if I wrecked and was hurt causes a fear in me I have never known. Perhaps a concern, that would make it valid. Either way, I am quiet and still before YOU, hurt in my soul, trusting YOU it was for my good, for OUR good for YOUR good.

YOU are good. YOU in me is good. A part for YOU I am not good. Without YOUR revelation in my life I am wretched, miserable, poor, blind and naked.

I am confident YOU hurt me for good. YOU can do that again, if it is necessary. I would rather it pass but it is very, very effective at getting me to pay attention to YOUR things and to YOUR heart. So bravo! I rejoice in YOUR present love. OUCH.

The Heart Breathes

The heart breathes grief and joy in the same breath. To hold our breath spiritually means we cease to be. Our mind takes over and we function but we do not live. We live by happiness or saddness but we do not know life. We see others enjoying life but we do not recognize it or know its source. For most of us, we hate grief. Yet it is our introduction into the air of heaven - joy. Only a heart that has known and experience and expressed grief can truly embrace joy. People joy choke because they have not been prepared by the grief of life and living. If you love with your heart, you are going to know grief.

Breathe. Love. Live. Grieve and you will know joy.

God promises to those who grieve great joy that overwhelmes and overtakes the grief. Psalm 126.